Iced in…again!!!

It has been so crazy with all the ice and snow in OK! The kids and I have not been out since Wednesday and it’s Sunday…and school is canceled tomorrow, too!!! Pictures to come later, I haven’t uploaded them yet. Despite being couped up, I am so thankful to have spent this time with my kids and my family…storms do have bright sides! Sienna is really starting to listen a LOT better and is just becoming a sweet, sweet girl. Devyn is recovering from his surgery very well and is beginning to walk on his boot. He has been such a trooper…not to mention that this is the second major snow storm to come thru and he has been unable to go out and play in it due to his leg! He presses on though!!! And, I am so thankful for my hubby. He works so hard for our family and is such a great example of a strong, hard working, loving, Christian father…and he’s my best friend! Sorry to get mushy…

LAST WEEK…ROUGH

I don’t know what it was, but last week was just rough for me. I had days long migraines. Plus, I was weepy and sad, kind of sulky even. I didn’t want to do ANYTHING. I just kept praying and remembered that even when you are down deep and you’re struggling-you can simply whisper His beautiful name…JESUS!!! And that’s exactly what I did. I also continued to keep up with my Bible plan (I’m reading through the Bible this year). Not to mention that my sweet hubby picked up the slack around the house…I came home to a clean house one day and what a tremendous blessing that was. God always provides and He is always right on time. Thank you Lord for Your power and provision in my life.

RUNNING

I am embarking on the new year with more running! I am not sure if I am at the point of addiction, but I think I am pretty close. I hope to run in six 5-K races this year! I ran in two last year and so I am confident that I can meet my goal. I am trying to increase my mileage and intensity slowly as I have dealt with TERRIBLE shin splints! I’ll keep ya posted as running is a part of my life now…it’s gonna come out on the blog!!!

BIBLE STUDY

I am very excited to have been asked to lead a Bible study at my church. This was actually quite a shock to me as I was not expecting it! But, I prayed about it, talked to my dear hubby, and happily agreed as I know that it is God’s will for me. I am looking forward to the study of the Bible and the fellowship that comes along with small groups!!! It’s awesome to see how the Lord is using me to further His kingdom while I am here on this earth.

Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ. ~Phillippians 1:6

 

New Semester

SCHOOL DAZE

Well, I’ve got a new semester starting and I am looking forward to it. I pray that I can encourage my students and help them to give back to their community as none of us can take credit for our accomplishments apart from those who have helped us to achieve them. As a Christian, I must say that all the glory goes to God for each and every success…and failure. All that we are and all that we do is a part of God’s perfect plan for our lives. It is absolutely awe-inspiring to think that every hair on our heads, every tear we cry is known by Him. He does in fact have the whole world in His hands. 

STILL STRUGGLING

I got my hair done today (by a very close friend) and found myself talking about Weston and the impact that his death has had and continues to have on me. I was on the edge of tears and I honestly and like that on many days, some are worse than others. I have been struck deep in my soul over the loss of dear Weston. I continue to pray for his parents and the rest of his family as I truly cannot imagine a daily walk in their shoes. Sweet Weston is forever loved, missed, and in my case, continuously used by God to draw me closer to Him. My mind and heart still wonder why Weston had to go and why his parents and everyone else who loved him must continue living in this fallen world and endure such pain and suffering. That is just it though. Weston’s death reminds me that I do have hope and that I can have peace that comes from my heavenly Father and that surpasses all human understanding.

When I ponder the pain, suffering, loss, and all the sin that just permeates this fallen place, I continue to long for the return of my savior Jesus Christ and to get HOME. Oh what a day of rejoicing it will be….

I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. ~John 16:33 

Wandering

IN THE DESERT….

 

 

 

 

 

Well, you can disregard the text, but the picture really captured how I feel right now. I feel alone…though I know that I am not. I will NEVER be alone for my name is written in His book. I will spend eternity with my Heavenly Father. But, oh this fallen world. Sometimes I just feel so lonely. Abandoned. Bothered. And a bother. I hold onto the hope that I will see the face of my savior one day. I pray for the Lord’s guidance and direction in my life. I strive to be a blessing to all those I come into contact with and for the most part I think that I do. But, I just feel this stirring in my soul that just can’t wait to check out of this place. Forgive me for being a bit dramatic, I am okay and not going crazy…I think!  :)

IN THE MIDDLE

I frequently feel that I am in the middle when it comes to my relationship with my mom and my uncle. It was going very well, but has since gone horribly bad. My uncle has once again given up his sobriety to become re-enslaved to the evil that is alcohol. I am not saying that alcohol is the devil or anything, but it can be. Especially to those who are addicted to it. So, that’s that. I know whole-heartedly that this is still within God’s control and I give it to Him. I pray and pray…..

SAD FOR THOSE WHO HAVE LOST

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a compassionate person who really and truly takes on the pain of others when they are suffering. I’m told that this is a gift, but sometimes it feels overwhelming, almost a burden. Now, I wouldn’t change it, but sometimes I think I make matters worse. I pray before I speak and act, so I hold onto my faith in God and that I am doing the right thing. A dear friend lost her brother to cancer and I lift her to God in prayer many times per day. In the meantime, I try to help her in any way that I can.

My sadness and grief over the loss of Weston continues. Sometimes I feel that I have turned a corner in my grieving only to feel that I have been slapped back down again by the bitter sting of this loss. I also remember his parents and grieve for their loss as I know that the void in their lives is unfathomable to me. My heart continues to bleed for the Guiltners, and of course for the Montgomery’s as well. I keep praying for God’s direction and His ability to use me as I still carry this grief exceptionally heavily (according to my grief counselor anyway).  I am so grateful that my life is in His hands.

HOMESICK

It seems like we are always wandering. Always searching. Always sojourning. Right now I am reading a book that deals with the ceaseless desire that we have to get home. That could not be more true of me. I can’t wait to get to heaven and experience the fullness of God. I feel like a stranger here and I can’t wait until I get up there where I belong. Until that day….

Hear my prayer, O LORD, listen to my cry for help; be not deaf to my weeping. For I dwell with you as an alien, a stranger, as all my fathers were. ~Psalm 39:12

Update

SNOWED IN!!!

Yep…we are snowed in! Not incredibly fun at this point since we’ve been stuck in the house since Thursday and today is Saturday!

Thankful that we never lost power and that we are all safe! Maybe we will make it to church tomorrow…we all pray that we get to go!

CHRISTMAS

Well, it wasn’t our most exciting Christmas ever, but we are so blessed! All four of us were together. In fact, we were snowed in…in the historic blizzard of 2009!!! Devyn is bummed that his leg is in a cast when we FINALLY have significant snow…poor guy!

The “lean” Christmas that we had this year was so great. It allowed us to focus more on the true meaning and the real gift of Christmas!

 ¹⁰But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. ¹¹Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. ~Luke 2:10-11

What a wonderful day…the day our savior was born!!! Thank you God for loving us so much to give your only son to save our souls and give us an eternal life with You on high! Jesus Christ is the Hope of Glory!!!

TREE

Well, I never took anymore pictures of the tree…it never got decorated (except for candy canes and it’s a pre-lit tree so it had lights). The angel was on the tree and we were blessed to have some gifts underneath!

SURGERY

 

 

WESTON’S BIRTHDAY

I didn’t get to go over to decorate at Weston’s trees, which I like to do on his birthday! But, I was able to be used by God to assist my dear friend as she welcomed her sweet baby girl that day…December 19th is SUCH a special day!!!

Since I didn’t get to go for his actual birthday (once I can dig my way out, I am still gonna go over and decorate a little because I enjoy doing it!), I am re-posting pics from last year!

 

Loving and missing Weston forever!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sad :(

Once again, I am struggling with the Christmas holiday. I cherish being with my husband and my kids, and my friends and family, but I still have yet to “get into the spirit” of decorating. I am eternally grateful for Christmas because I would have no hope without my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I am sad for the Guiltners and I can’t get Weston out of my mind. I go to music class and I just sit and stare at this little boy because he looks similar to Weston when I first met him. I find myself feeling like ditching class, but I want to see this little boy. Maybe I’m just nuts, but I have not taken any other death as hard as Weston’s. I also find myself feeling close to Weston when I’m in the presence of his parents though I don’t see them as often I would like. I have been used by God to encourage and to pray for people in ways that I never have been before. I have experienced more growth and have borne fruit for the kingdom of God. For this, I can only be thankful to God for continuing to grow me and prune me for His purposes. I give Him control over everything in my life and I trust Him and thank Him for being in control of all that happens in my life. I praise Him forever and ever.

The Son is the radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word. After he had provided purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty in heaven. ~Hebrews 1:3